Diet and exersise

This sucks! I have been on this diet for 2 weeks now and I am ready to just rip into a bag of freakin chips and dip eat nachos and wash it down with a gallon of sweet tea!! My wife and I have also joined a gym and I didn't realise how out of shape I was until I got on the stair master thing and had to check my heart rate every 2 seconds.....I swear I heard the machine say under its breath to slow down fat boy you gonna pass out! Of course I gotta get in beach shape and have 2 weeks to get r done so I don't have the beach patrol trying to push me back in the ocean thinking I am a beached white whale...